Saturday 18 November 2017

I Accept No Responsibility


It all started quite innocently. It was the final meeting for the CWA for the year. Technically our Christmas party. Then, because of the kids, most members went home. I then blame Gill for the rest of the evening because next thing I know I’m crying out to a bunch of twenty somethings to stop feeding me Moscato. I was tiddly enough without their help. I had flash backs of the night I was on the rum and OJ at Wudinna Pub and Sharlee and Stacey were convincing me to part myself from the porcelain throne. I didn’t really want that to happen again.

If you want to see a spectacular show of mullets, this evening was perfect for such viewing. There was even a pair of cut-off, acid wash jeans to accompany one mullet. One mullet hung around a lot. I cacked myself with laughter at the crap he was trying to spin.

Toward midnight I hid under the table in the foyer of the Golfie. I was determined not to go to Kirby’s. The last time I went there with Stace I felt old and that the place was like a meat market. Somehow, some lady, who I think may have been called Brenda, was driving myself, Courtney, Jade and AJ Ben to the exact place I was trying to avoid. And somehow, during the night, we’d collected a number of AJ’s (aka Army Jerks for those who miss out on having a defence base near to them).

At Kirby’s Gill was trying to get yet more booze down my throat and yet I threw back water instead much to the amusement of many. I danced and danced with everyone. Soon attendees of Sam’s 40th birthday were dancing alongside us. Then I had some random ask me if I wanted a drink and a dance. Um, no. This was the point that I decided to get the hell out of there. Whilst grabbing my stuff random number two asked me for a drink and a dance. I told him I had a husband and two kids and that I was going home to them now. I then let security and Sam’s husband know I was going home because this is K-Town after all.

Stepping outside I looked down the street at the local vagrants and opted for a taxi for the pathetic distance to the house-sit and happily paid the minimum fare to get home safely.

Apparently, I’m going to hit the town again on the 1st of December if anyone wants to throw me a lifeline? Anyone?

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